| Twisted Visions Collection: Issue 24 |
[19 Jul 2011|12:32am] |
I can't believe it's been over a year since I had any vivid dreams to write about, but here's two very dark depressing ones I had recently.
One:
I was out at this market place with my mother, filled with interesting old things, clocks, buttons, things I like.
We were hungry, so we stopped to get some kebabs, then we split up for a while which is when I passed a darkened tent. Looking inside I see a movie is playing with no one else around. I sit down and place what was left of the kebab dead centre at the back of the tent. No reason, I just had to I guess. There were no chairs, just a grassy floor.
And this is where the dream gets disturbing, the movie playing on the screen was the most disgusting things I have ever seen in my life.
It's a Korean film, set in a fictional country in the distant future that has swiftly and violently been conquered by a neighbouring country. It has been completely walled-off form the rest of the world and the citizens up until that point had been used as slave labour, Now deemed a waste of resources and too weak to use as labour, the army is ordered to eliminate any one left.
We then meet our protagonist who is an average man, he looks to be in his 50's, very skinny with shaved short grey hair. He is about to be taken to something like a concentration camp. He's lost everything, his family, his home, but he's not willing to give up just yet.
In order to escape he opens a hidden passage way into the old subway station, I'm not sure how he knew about it, this is never explained. Never-the-less, he's so relieved he found this place and that he could open it up. Only to be horror struck by what was hidden in the subway.
This is where the soldiers had been hiding all the corpses from the concentration camp, just masses off them. All bloated and giving off odours so foul and thick as to be suffocating.
In abject horror he throws up, the small hope he held on to was fleeting at the impossible task that lay before him. In the distance he can hear a military vehicle rounding the corner, his options were laid before him. If he is to meet death at the end of this day it will be as a free man.
He looks upwards to the eerie ever-purple sky and takes ones last breath before entering the subway and beginning his gruesome journey.
Our protagonist had worked many odd jobs in his life, dealing with plumbing, clearing away dead animals and even cleaning up crime scenes. Anything that would pay and sometimes things that didn't like changing nappies and looking after his two sons whenever they got sick.
He has a strong stomach, he's been covered from head-to-toe in dirt before, he thought he'd smelt and felt all the worst the world had to offer. But there was nothing on earth that could prepare him for this.
The corpses were stacked so high, he had no choice but to climb over them and all he was wearing were some old shorts. He holds his breath and tries to keep above them. But the bodies have been there so long that they have all become soft like rotten fruit, he's falling, like being drawn into putrid quicksand.
He tries to keep his eyes straight forward, he can't afford to look down and pause to consider that these sacks of fluid, now too fragile to touch, were once living beings. Individuals with their own personalities and memories, now they are here with no one to remember or care about them, could they have ever imagined this to be their fate?
Finally, he gets past them to a clear passage way with clean water running through it, he cleans himself up and continues to wander. I should mention this now, the story continually changes perspectives, sometimes I am the man, sometimes I am watching him on the screen in the empty tent and then for no discernible reason as dreams are wont to do, it becomes a video game.
Anyway, just when our he thinks he is safe, he enters a room much like a hospital, there are more bodies here, this time strung up from the ceiling.
He sits on the surgery table, for reasons I don't understand, but now I look at him. Really look into his eyes and see just how tormented this man is. I see that with the very last of his strength he wants to see outside the city, to see the sun and open grassy fields even if it is his last time.
After a time, he goes to leave the room when one of the corpses on a meat-hook tears in two and releases all sorts of foul liquid all over our poor protagonist. He just stares at himself and at the mess for a moment before finally adding to it with yet more vomit.
*The sheer amount of bodily fluid in this dream, I swear a kindergarten class with gastro could not out-do it.
After having a moment to collect himself as best he can, our protagonist venture into the next room, which is conveniently a shower room. Washing himself again, he hears a loud moan.
Turning the shower off, he hides around a corner to see a mass of corpses have joined together to create one giant monstrosity.
He runs down the halls, only to be chased by the creature, in his panic he jumps onto a ceiling fan and is somehow able to keep just far enough away from the monster.
After his panic subsides at realising it has no means of reaching him, he jumps onto a nearby bookcase bringing it crashing down upon the creature, instantly killing it.
Or protagonist continues to wander through rooms for awhile before finding a highly furnished, grandiose Victorian room that logically should have no place in a laboratory-converted-from-a-subway-station.
Decore aside, this room is well lit by natural light and it smells of sweet, clean air in bold contrast to its surroundings.
Our protagonist begins to weep as he rushes towards the door at the far side of the room, he stands in awe of the outside world. It is overwhelmingly magnificent.
Timidly, as if fearing this to be a dream, he sets foot upon the long soft grass, maybe it's the great sense of relief both the character and I felt after such torment, but the world was so colourful, so detailed.
Behind him is that massive walled in city and he is shocked to see how ugly his little cage that he had spent his life in was.
He resolves to never return and the dreams end with him walking away.
Dream two, which occurred just last night:
I am wandering through a large house, which seemed reminiscent of a martial arts film. It rested high upon a mountain-side, made of dark red wood, crisp calico sheets divide the rooms.
It is serene here, the sun, high in the sky, is shining down on a pine forest not unlike those of California. The dry, warm wind blows crimson and blue curtains that separate the balcony from the interior.
As I continue exploring I notice in my peripheral a large, dark figure sitting on a couch, I turn to face Aku, the villain from Samurai Jack. For intruding in his home he flings me at random to another dimension, this dimension would turn out be both heaven on earth and a living hell.
This is the land of purgatory, some unforeseen being has allowed the living to contact the dead. But it is not without rules, for one day only you may visit your deceased loved ones, the downside is that neither person remembers who was alive and who was dead, you also have no concept of time.
The worst part is that there is no afterlife, the living and the dead are transported to a perpetually moonlit park to spend their 24 hours together.
To see all these people so overjoyed at one and filled with a crushing sorrow the next was heartbreaking. I awoke feeling sick.
There were a few people I remember specifically, a young woman with a black and grey spotted Great Dane.
A lonely old woman and a little girl, and young newly-wed couple who consisted of a woman with red hair and her boyfriend with messy black hair, both wore teal shirts and beige trench coats (it's a dream, do you really expect me to explain why?).
The woman was running around playing with her dog, I was standing by watching when suddenly the dog turned to black smoke and evaporated. The woman was devastated as the memory of why we were all there came back to her.
She explained the aforementioned rules to me and I felt my heart sink to my stomach, somehow I knew every person in this place and I was terrified to find out which of them would not be returning to the real world with us.
I ran to find the old woman first, I wanted to protect the little girl and not let her see who I assumed was her grandmother turn to smoke. I found them and picked her up, but as I did she turned to smoke, stunned I stared at the space between my empty arms. In a twist my own mind constructed, the old woman explained that the girl was in fact her daughter who had drowned in the 1970's. The old woman was actually alive and well.
I don't remember much about the young couple beyond the woman being the one who died, but just before she disappears her husband shoots himself in the head and the two instantly turn to smoke together.
You may wonder how I recall dreams in such detail, only a small part of a dream is visual, most of it is an intangible feeling, we instinctively know certain details. Somehow I'm jut able to retain my dreams right down to those tiny details.
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| 2010 Pop Culture |
[02 Jan 2011|12:48pm] |
I read alot of comics and books, I listen to alot of music and podcasts and I watch alot of TV and movies and I play a few games in between.
My love of popular culture probably stems from my own vivid imagination and needing it to be stimulated, pop culture also works as a way to connect to even complete strangers.
My favourite films of this year, that were released this year are Tron Legacy, Kick-Ass and Inception in that order.
Overall 2010 wasn't a great year for film, but I had fun watching those movies, they inspired me to make costumes, that's all I need.
You've probably heard hundreds of other reviewers explain why these films are good or bad, so I'll spare you.
I also gave older films a chance and wasn't disappointed. Guess I just wasn't at the right point in my life to get Kubrick or some Japanese films before.
Being that I spent most of this year at home I picked up the PS3 controllers a couple of times. I discovered I have a love for action adventure type games with focus on character and story. I played Uncharted 2 at the beginning of this year and that was alot of fun.
The other game I played, and spent a hell of a long time playing, was Red Dead Redemption.
I am a huge fan of westerns, I watched the Sergio Leone trilogy again in 2010 with my brother I love them so much.
It was an immersive, complex and always engaging film, it's a wonderful homage to the genre. The music, the slight cheesiness, the landscape and classic plot style. I easily spent three or four months playng the game and then just exploring the world and online.
Plus they released a zombie expansion pack around Halloween, what more could anyone ask for?
This year I got Arkham Asylum, so I'll play that as soon as I'm finished writing this.
Music, how I learned to love the CD again. There was a long time where I would just download everything, why pay for something you can get for free right?
But the collector in me appreciated owning the music the inspired me so much, also the audio quality is better and listening to an album all the way through is a wonderful experience.
I have Quadrophenia by the Who, Furious Angels by Rob Dougan, the Kill Bill and Ennio Morricone collection. The entire discography of E.S. Posthumus, Muse, Gorillaz, Kasabian, the soundtrack to Cowboy Bebop (alot of Jazz and Blues, stuff I'd never normally listen to)).
Some other things were the Potbelleez, Tchaikovksy, Stravinsky(delighfully dark) and my favourite album of the year was Invaders Must Die by the Prodigy, or Daft Punk' Tron Legacy.
My New Year's Resolution is to write down every single film I watch this year and probably a couple of years after that. I'd like to get a proper average of the films I would watch in my life.
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| 2010: Forever Batman |
[02 Jan 2011|12:23pm] |
Last New Year's Eve I was listening to the radio on my new phone and playing my new Lego Batman game on PSP while waiting for midnight. This year I got Batman Arkham Asylum on PS3 for my birthday (Jan 2), I seem to always surround myself with the Dark Knight.
Anyway, lately I haven't felt like posting anything because this blog is really just for my own benefit to remember my mindset at particular points in my past. So I'll always do a year in review and here's 2010.
It seems strange to try and compress a whole year into one post, life is full of so many great little moments. Some you forget, some won't be that interesting to anyone else but you.
2009, I finished Tafe and didn't get into WAAPA, I felt the future was uncertain and it made me reflect upon myself and what I really wanted in life.
I tried to find somewhere else to study but I was too late even for mid-year courses. I spent most of this year searching for a job, I got a few temporary jobs which were interesting.
I was an Xmas casual at Diva, probably the worst store to work at. They make you act super friendly and they're VERY strict on that. And that's putting it lightly.
Then I worked at Costume Studio, a costume store that my mother heard about from one of her customers. She's sells Laurastar irons and one of the women who bought one mentioned she needed a new iron for her store.
So good work getting me that job, mum.
Then just recently my mum got me a job again (she's like my agent). She has this natural ability to talk to people, I mean it's amazing, she's gotten complete strangers to open up about the most personal stuff.
She found out that Kmart were looking for people and I've been working there for the past three weeks.
Probably the best job I've had, pays well enough and unlike my previous jobs I'm actually kept busy.
I'm going for my driver's test next week, so I'll be on my P's soon. Currently saving up for a car, or the HP Touchsmart TM2, which ever I need the most first.
I will be starting WAAPA in February, I finally got in after spending a year really focusing on my costume making and designing.
Last time I auditioned I had only made four costumes, all of which were fairly basic and weren't constructed very well. I felt divided between my former dream of being an artist and my new found passion for sewing.
This year I had so many costumes to choose from I had to omit some from my final presentation. They were very impressed with my more unusual costumes, involving lights, latex or constructed costumes with moving masks.
I realised that although I love drawing, the final product is not as satisfying or as interactive as a costume. I discovered most of my drawings are character or costume designs anyway, I just use it as a tool to show others my ideas.
There is a quote from Neil Gaiman's the Graveyard Book which goes something like this 'you will always be who you are, but who you are is always changing'.
And I'm beginning to realise it's very true, I look back on my old blogs and it's definitley me and my style. But it's different in subtle ways, slightly pretentious, slightly angsty.
I'm not really like that any more, the brooding, shy outcast from highschool is gone. I'm much more confident, peaceful and open minded. I don't let things bother me anymore.
My inner Batman has turned into my inner John Lennon.
It could be that it's because I'm growing up, or that everything is going my way right now, or that I've got real direction and motivation in life.
Either way things are looking hopeful for 2011.
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| Twilight Made Better |
[21 Nov 2010|12:12am] |
I rewrote Twilight in a few minutes with very little effort. I also fixed up a few plot holes and omitted some unimportant crap.
So the story begins with Bella starting at a new school. She's introverted and shy, the kind of person whom no one would notice if she were there or not.
But to make her somewhat interesting, let's just say she's a quirky, ecclectic character who would probably be fairly understanding about the existance of vampires as werewolves.
She's intelligent enough, but a weak, easily dominated personality.
I would have her played by Ellen Page, because damn that girl can act!
Little does she know that a vampire has been stalking her since she arrived in Forks.
He is over 100-years-old and is looking for a female human to carry his first child.
You see vampires cannot reproduce in the traditional sense as a female vampire's womb is a very inhospitable home for a fetus.
I just made that up, but I assume their immune systems must be really strong.
Anyway, he enrols in the highschool in order to get closer to Bella and immediatley he's the most popular person there. Taking cues from Lugosi's Dracula he would be the confident, intelligent, charismatic personality that you're inexplicably drawn to.
I don't know who would play him who's currently the right age. Any suggestions? He needs to look young but seem mature beyond his years.
He is soon dating Bella and they are happy enough, although she occasionaly gets glimpses of something cold and terrifying hiding beneath his charming exterior.
But even at her most suspicious, she is enjoying her newfound popularity and is reluctant to leave him. She's almost too afraid to.
Later she meets Jacob who is a member of a vampire-hunting werewolf pack. And that deserves to be every bit as badass as that sounds.
He reveals everything to Bella and is desperatley trying to save her through the rest of the narrative. They have no romantic connection, he's just doing his job but to Bella he only represents conflict and confusion.
Edward has brainwashed her, almost like the traditional vampiric hypnotism. She's perfectly obedient in his presence, but seperated for a prolonged period of time she returns to her usual self.
So she goes from running from the werewolves to needing their protection. This makes her incredibley difficult to trust and also it makes her feel helpless and alone.
She can't tell any humans about this either, not even her parents or Edward will kill them.
See, that wasn't so hard, I created interesting characters and plot points with conflict and real human emotions and reactions!
And all it took me was half an hour. Although now I really want to know how it ends, so I might just keep writing this.
Does Edward knock Bella up? Do the werewolves save her? Or does she finally grow a backbone and take control of her own life?
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| What The Hell Are You Doing?! |
[07 Nov 2010|12:47pm] |
Why are you not listening to Podcast X?!?1
It's a great podcast where Trenchcoat Mafia, Vixen, Starhawk, Trekkie and myself review some of the worst comics ever published. Yet somehow they give new life and meaning to these comics.
I listen to it whenever I draw.
Be warned though, it is very crude, so it's not for pussies who are easily offended and NSFW.
http://podcastx.blogspot.com/
Courtney- Podcast X's official head minion.
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| The Worst Teacher In The World |
[22 Aug 2010|08:32pm] |
I was thinking back to primary school the other day because my mother had mentioned one of my old teachers. We were trying to remember which grade he taught, so I went and listed off all of them.
Then I got to seventh grade and I suddenly remembered a woman whom I had tried to block out from my memory entirely.
Barbara Warner, she was the one who made my last year of primary school hell, but because I was so young I didn't really understand why.
The more I thought about it the more obvious it became that she was deliberatley abusing her power and being sadistic.
Her answer to bullying? Make us sit in a circle and tell each of our classmates what we hate about them.
Seriously, who would have ever thought that would end well?
We were twelve-years-old, we were all obnoxious with very little inhibition. We would annoy each other one day and be the best of friends the next.
I seem to recall alot of us refused to say anything bad about the other kids. I'm kind of mute alot of the time, so I probably didn't say much either. But I do remember I was very good at doing vocal impressions, like Gollum or the Joker or alot of different animal noises.
I got quite popular with that, kids would give requests I couldn't say no.
So while I enjoyed this popularity there were few people with anything negative to say about me. Except for one boy who said that I annoyed him.
Now that's not a big deal, perfectly understandable that after you've heard 'my precious' for the 100th time while trying to do work is a bit distracting.
But back then I didn't take it so well, did I mention I was kind of a bully? So I hated him and I stole things from him, probably hit him once or twice. And it was the same story for the rest of the class.
This woman had instantly turned a class of fairly good kids with only a few cases of bullying into complete chaos, we had all turned on one another.
If that wasn't bad enough, we then learnt about BMI, fairly straight forward project. I think we did it again in highschool.
The difference here was she made us trade our worksheets with the person next to us and had them read the results out to the class.
Now I've always been really active and when you are that young you don't really count your calories or worry so much about your appearance. I ate like a horse but I burnt most of it off and my metabolism took care of the rest. But according to the BMI I was over-eating, that's really embarrassing. Probably not as bad as it was for the kids who actually carried extra weight of whom there were about three or four.
So that made me become a bit phobic about eating for awhile.
'Act your age' is what she was always telling us 'you're about to enter highschool and become adults. Don't give me excuses, do better, ect, ect'.
Now I have a brother in seventh grade now and looking at him and his classmates they are children, stupid, immature and still a long way off from any real responsibility and certainly adulthood.
Yet she expected us to be able to do alot of things on our own, she's a teacher she's supposed to, oh I don't know, TEACH?!
And I think this was her fundamental problem, she just didn't care.
But she pretended to, I have mentioned before that I suffered from depression from about the age of 11 to 13.
My mother told her at the beginning of the year and Mrs.Warner said 'don't worry, my daughter has the same thing, I'll look after you.'
Phht, I think she made it worse and one of many reasons would be this.
There was a retarded girl in my class and I had never shared a class with her until that year, so while the other students were perfectly used to her, I was not.
And I am terrified of mentally handicapped people, especially when I was a kid. To me there was no discernible difference between them and zombies. Hell I thought if this girl bit me I'd turn into one of them.
I wasn't stupid, I just had an overactive imagination coupled with depression.
She really shouldn't have been in that school, she was dangerous, she was aggresive and the biggest kid in the class. When I say she looked like a neanderthal, I am not kidding.
So I tried to stay well away from her, but I guess Mrs.Baba-Yaga noticed I was repulsed by her so she took every opportunity to put us together. Did she think this would magically solve the problem?
What the hell did I do to this woman to piss her off, surely I was not the worst child in the class? Was this her sick idea of 'looking after me'?
Once I lost my hat, the teacher found it and gave it to the retard to hand back to me. Another time I had missed a day of school due to a panic attack or just general depression, that was pretty common at the time. So I missed out on starting our Mother's Day projects, but I had been there when we had chosen our materials.
The next day I come back to school to find my container of materials is empty. I ask her if she had seen where they went and she just shrugs her shoulders and non-chalantly says the retard finished her project so she gave her my stuff to work on.
What.The.Fuck? I mean in who's mind does that sound fair or reasonable?
So I didn't get to make anything, but even though I was the quiet one, I had a chemical imbalance in my brain I was prone to some crazy shit.
So I destroyed both of the retard's creations right in front of the teacher. Unfortunatley I can no longer recall the consequences of that action, but I bet she would have given me detention or some crap like that.
Then we did Tae Kwon Do, again I was partnered up with the retard even though I already had a partner, she wasn't there one of those days.
This fucking bitch of a teacher expected me to be cool with the retard putting me in a choke hold. If I had been older I would have told her to shove it, but at twelve I just felt powerless got scared and ran away.
So thanks Mrs.Warner for fucking everything up for me and presumabley your other students, I sincerely hope you are no longer teaching.
One may wonder why I bring this up six years later and get upset about it. But the fact is this isn't an isolated case, there are probably hundreds if not thousands of teachers who are absolute pricks and do nothing to benefit their students.
The solution? Robots, duh, the answer to everything.
Also, my advice for today is never post anything on the Internet that you wouldn't want your mother to see.
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| What Do You Want 1985? |
[14 Jul 2010|11:05pm] |
For some reason the date, or numerical sequence 1985 continues to follow me in everyday life. Here I shall list every example I come across.
No I'm not crazy, you are.
1985, a Marvel comic by Mark Millar
1985, a song by Bowling for Soup
Crisis on Infinite Earths, a DC comic published in 1985
Back to the Future, released in 1985
I saw a license plate had 1985 on it
The main narrative of Watchmen is set in 1985
I'd like to think there's something more interesting behind this, perhaps it's just coincidence and my mind is searching for patterns that aren't there. After all, nine and one are the most commonly occuring numbers.
Or it could be something cool, like my past-life died or I was somehow responsible for something significant that year.
I was born in 1992 and my parents met in 1986 and married in 1988, so no relevance there.
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| For Sale |
[27 Jun 2010|11:55pm] |
Doing a bit of cleaning and found some toys I want to sell, I will ship anywhere, but you’re paying. My Paypal is my email address.
Feel free to haggle on price.
Spider-Man 2 - 12” action figure, loose, $20
Spider-Man 3 - 10” Venom action figure, loose, $20
Spider-Man Origins - 6” Venom action figure, loose (with base) $15
POTC - Davey Jones glowing display, MIB, $35
Bratz Doll - MIB, $25
Batman Begins 30" My Size Batman Action Figure, $100
Kingdom Hearts necklace and ring gift set, MIB, $30
http://i19.photobucket.com/albums/b175/DarthCourtney/P1010517.jpg
http://www.getprice.com.au/images/uploadimg/880/350__1_davy-jones.jpg
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| You will always be you, but who you are is always changing |
[18 Jun 2010|12:26am] |
I'm trying to post something at least once a month, but it all depends on whether any of my thoughts are worth posting.
Lately I've been thinking about how strange it is that we are able to change our minds, we can do it instantly, we may even end up with completely oppposite opinions to the ones you started off with.
I don't know if this is the way for everyone, but I almost feel embarrased when I end up liking something I used to hate.
But I guess that helps me to become a more open-minded and reserved person.
I give everything a chance, I analyse it thoroughly and then I make a final judgement. But even then I sometimes see things with different eyes later on. And I don't even mean after new information has been presented.
It makes me wonder what really makes me who I am, why do I react the way I do to the world around me, only for that initial reaction to later change?
Sometimes that initial reaction is absolutley right and set in stone. For example, I knew Twilight was bad. But not wanting to be a hypocrite I gave it a chance anyway, maybe there was something in it I just wasn't getting.
But no, it was a shining example of everything you shouldn't do when writing a narrative. I'll stick to my Neil Gaiman, thankyouverymuch!
Anime is something I have gone back and forth with. When I was a child, like all children, I would watch whatever was on TV. And during the late '90's-2000's it was all about anime.
I enjoyed Astroboy, Dragon Ball Z, Card Captors and Yu-Gi-Oh (I even had a crush on Bakura, bleh).
I was also a crazy hard-core fan of Pokemon, it was my first obsession and my first collection of merchandise.
And then I reached a certain age where I could see how cheesy it was and I moved on (to LOTR).
Fast-forward about eight years and I have a new found respect for anime, I realised that it wasn't all as terrible as the shows of my childhood. Some of them have amazing writing, animation and are far more mature than DBZ.
Hayao Miyazaki is a genius, Princess Mononoke is one of the most beautiful movies I have ever seen in my life.
I've also watched Akira and Cowboy Bebop recently and really enjoyed them as well. For someone who loves Cyberpunk one would think I would have naturally gravitated towards anime.
Really, it was the hardcore Japanophiles or Weebos that kept me away.
Now days I would go so far as to say that on average Japan's animation is superior to western animation. Although the character designs are still a little off-putting.
But one thing that makes abolutley no sense to me now is that upon seeing Batman Begins for the first time I actually hated it. I didn't get it and found it boring.
But now I understand the genius of Chris Nolan, though it should have been immediatley apparent.
So all in all, I have a love hate relationship with change. I welcome external change, the world around me would be pretty dull if it stayed the same.
But when it comes to change in myself, I almost fear it. I fear physical change, I fear change of mind and losing whatever it is that makes me who I am.
Yet at the same time, I don't want to end up like Rorscach, stubborn and dogmatic about never compromising...
Oh, I'm probably rambling at this point. I don't know why my mind starts going late at night, yet my cognotive abilities have lessened considerably.
Anyway, what have you changed your mind about in your life? Could be from childhood or it could have been in the past fews years. Which for me those two things are one in the same.
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| 1000 Words |
[21 Apr 2010|09:08pm] |
I tend to keep my articles around 900 to 1000 words, this is because I know I don't enjoy reading off of a screen and I am often busy attending to other things on the Internet to read lengthy articles.
So I figure most people are the same.
But are my articles too long or could I made them even longer?
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| The Culture of Nostalgia |
[21 Apr 2010|09:02pm] |
Neoteny
Noun
1. (biology) The retention of juvenile characteristics in adulthood.
Etymology
From German Neotenie, in turn from Ancient Greek νέος (neos), “‘young’”) and τείνειν (neos), “‘tend to’”).
In previous centuries one could be considered an adult at as young as fourteen.
Take Romeo and Juliette for example; Juliette was only fourteen and yet she was expected to already be married and have her own children.
Steadily over the decades the ascent into adulthood has arrived later and later.
The average person in their 20's is single, still living with their parents and working and studying part-time.
Why is this?
Well one could put it down to our longer life spans, more specific career choices and that on average we spend approximatley a quarter of our lives in education.
There's also the fact that we try to shelter our children from harsh realities. And in most countries we don't afford teens the freedoms of driving a car, going to nightclubs or drinking among other things until they are 18-years-old.
Sounds riduclous when you think back to Romeo and Juliette doesn't it?
I mean, can you remember what you were doing at age fourteen?
You were probably a pretensious, self-conscious highschooler who wouldn't last a week without your parents.
A fourteen-year-old Spartan kid would hand you your ass ten times over.
Well actually he could probably do that to any modern adult, but I digress.
I would like to quote Fight Club here, it's a favourite of mine actually:
"We're the middle children of history, man. No purpose or place. We have no Great War. No Great Depression.
Our Great War's a spiritual war... Our Great Depression is our lives."
Generation X and beyond have never faced any great hardship as a whole to force us all to grow up.
And as a result we have a very child-like culture.
Nostalgia is a billion dollar industry, in what other time could there be an M rated cinematic adaptation of a kid's cartoon?
Films are no longer films, but franchises that can span decades and cross all mediums.
Previous generations regarded animation and comic books as children's entertainment. Conventions didn't come around until after the original Star Trek series.
Costumes were for Halloween or parties, cosplay and costuming groups were unheard of. Especially the amount of money and effort that goes into them today.
And toys were just play things meant to be taken out of their packages and destroyed and chewed and possibly melted.
Now days they are expensive collectibles, beautifully painted and sculpted to look as if these figures were alive.
The people who grew up with, say for example, Batman never quite moved on.
Batman the Animated Series or the Nolan films are examples of top notch writing, directing and acting.
And yet this was all inspired by cheesy comics and a certain tv series from the 60's.
Granted modern pop culture hasn't been around that long, comics started in WWII, cinema came around at the beginning of the 20th century along with animation. And the Internet, possibley the biggest contributor to the preservation of nostalgia, has only really become a household thing in this century.
Still you don't see many of our grandparents holding onto the things of their childhood beyond a sentimental level.
And you know what all of this is called? It's 'geek culture' and it's becoming more and more mainstream.
Now I can't say this applies to everyone. I do know many people who don't know much about popular culture, but they definitley hold onto certain other neotenous behaviour.
And I am curious as to whether this phenomenon is global or not.
I've been able to find toy and comic stores in all the countries I have visited and I am aware of comic conventions all over the world.
I'd be particularly interested to know if people of poverty-stricken or war-torn countries have any sort of neotenous traits.
Imust admit I myself am a neotenous person. On the one hand I am the oldest child, I was always very mature, intelligent and serious for my age. I have never really fit in, I have been betrayed by those whom I considered friends many times. We moved house every year or two.
I suffered from depression at age eleven to thirteen and I was kicked out of highschool at fifteen.
So those are all factors that could have made me let go of my childhood faster. And yet they didn't.
I had a good childhood and I have a wonderful family, they are very supportive so I never felt like I had to go through those things alone.
I am an artist and as such I consider cartoons, comics, movies and costumes artforms to be studied and analysed.
I admit that when I was going through some hard times I would often distract myself with fiction.
And I have always loved collecting, especially toys. I didn't think anything of that until my sixteenth birthday when all my friends came over to my house.
The general reaction was 'you still play with toys?.'
I was like 'yeah, doesn't everyone?'
And my mum will often tell me to save up my money for more important things. But I enjoy buying comics, DVDs and action figures.
And I look forward to conventions all year around.
So overall I say there's no harm in keeping the excitement and imagination of childhood alive through out our entire lives. But it is an interesting phenomenon, one that is unique only to those alive today.
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| The Twisted Visions Collection: Issue 23 |
[09 Mar 2010|10:38pm] |
Dream 1, occured the night after Top Gear:
I met David Bowie and got his autograph, the entire dream takes place on an unending boardwalk at sunset. As I was driving off I looked in my rear vision mirror and saw he was following me.
A little odd, but I didn't think much of it.
I return my gaze to the road and I am forced to stop suddenly as a chain smashes into the hood of my car.
There is a legion of evil super-human children around the ages of 10-15 blocking my path.
Bowie stoppped his car behind mine.
He stands on top of his car and yells "attack!"
Naturally I'm scared and confused. But then I realised that I too have super powers and I defeated them all.
The end!
Dream 2:
I find myself wandering a building with a layout much like that of a multi-story car park. I believe it may have been a library or a university.
Not very new, it was all brown bricks and white paint.
I see a tv on in one of the rooms. The news report says that the world was ending, people were fleeing to whatever spacecrafts were available. I was one of the unfortunate few that was left stranded.
But here's where it gets strange, the remaining population is made up mostly of poleepwka. Or the "prawns" from District 9 if you will.
And the world is ending because of these orange wires that are draped everywhere. There's not a square foot on the planet that isn't covered in them.
Apparently they are hooked up to some unseen bomb that neither exists here nor there, but presents an entirely real threat.
I look back at the TV and realise that it was Stephen Colbert delivering the news.
His is the final broadcast Earth will ever make and Stephen was obsessed with holding that title over everyone, especially John Stewart. Even if it does mean giving up his life.
He's been on air for the past 12 hours, he's been drinking and is now halfway between crying and mad laughter.
For some reason he is sitting in a pool shaped like his desk and he is in a bright blue singlet and board shorts with an inflatable duck around his waist.
I start to doubt if it is Stephen anymore. or if it ever was, because he now bares a striking resemblance to Hunter S Thompson.
This is where the dream becomes vivid and I am able to express realistic reactions.
I am angry and terrified at the fact that I, with a dozen zombie and apocalyse plans was one of the few left behind.
Where is my family?
And why is it that the aliens of all beings are stranded?
Surely if I cut these wires I can stop this bomb?
And then I wake up.
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| I AM IN JEREMY CLARKSON'S iPHONE!11!! |
[17 Feb 2010|12:29pm] |
Top Gear came back to Sydney on their second world tour a year after their first one.
So of course my family had to go.
...Even though Hamster wouldn't be there.
This time we were sitting pretty close to the stage and I needed a sure-fire way to get their attention. But how?
With a costume of course! Nothing attracts more attention (except maybe an airhorn), and I do like making costumes.
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The process: skip if you're of the tl;dr variety:
I drew a picture of a female/rule 63 version of The Stig a few years ago (see "upcoming projects" entry). It wasn't very good or very accurate.
But it served as the basis for the costume I would eventually make.
The entire thing was constructed in 24 hours, not including time spent scouting items.
Some say The Stig's entire costume is worth $1500 usd. So I had to look at cheaper options.
The Stig's Australian female cousin costume only cost me about $100aud.
I started with a jumpsuit pattern from the 1960's I found on ebay. Who knew jumpsuit patterns were so hard to find?
http://ny-image1.etsy.com/il_fullxfull.99462417.jpg
I had to shorten the middle quite a bit and modify the sleeves and collar.
Then I had to sew in all the lines into the satin. That was time consuming to get it all perfect. But accuracy is essential for a good cosplay.
I sewed black piping into the sleeves and then added the Alpinestar logos and "The Stig" patch that were printed on printable material.
I knew I would be wearing my white Converse boots, they were perfect for the costume.
I also bought batting gloves off ebay that served well instead of the ridiculously expensive Alpinestar ones.
That just left the helmet.
Fortunatley a friend of mine had an old small white helmet sitting in his shed that he let me have.
It was quite rotten on the inside, so I had to clean it out and take the foam part out of the front.
But it came out fine in the end. Only problem was it had a clear visor.
A new one would be hard to locate. So car tint it was then.
Another ebay purchase. It was a bitch to get on as it's not made for curved surfaces.
Doesn't look too crinkly in photos I think.
-----------------
So we were in Sydney for six days, had a wonderful time. Even though the city is about as Australian as Hong Kong, especially because it was Chinese New Year.
Boy was it humid though, you stood outside for just a few minutes and you'd be sticky.
Went up to the Blue Mountains, the Maritime Museum which had a mythology exhibition, and did lots of shopping and visited alot of resturaunts. Oh and I saw Avatar (again) in the world's largest IMAX cinema in the world. But I won't bore you with all that.
Although photos of such things can be found on my DeviantART.
I was so excited about seeing Top Gear, but also excited to debut my costume.
I'm a little shy, but I never get embarrased in a costume. I consider it performance art, a way to show off my talents and bring a little bit of "wtf?" to people's monotonous lives.
I was suprised however, as I made my way to the train station that so many people had never seen Top Gear. I was called Evil Kenivel, an alien and The Sting. Oh and I was laughed at by two chavs. Really, they have no right to laugh at anyone else if they knew what they looked like.
*Sigh* but that all changed when I got to the showgrounds.
I didn't get much attention before the show, but after it I was well recieved. People got photos with me and even thought I was part of the show/promotions.
And then it happened, my dream actually became reality.
During the "Cool Wall" segment where the the hosts ask the audience what they think of certain cars, I popped my helmet on so as to be more visible in the crowd. Sure enough as Jeremy was glancing around the audience his eyes hovered on me.
But they just went on with the next act.
A little later there was a game where one half of the audience played against the other in a virtual car race. We were given green and red cars to control it.
For the lap times wall the hosts had to pick a representative from the audience.
Jeremy chose me.
It was all a bit of a blur, it was so surreal I couldn't take it all in but I think it went like this:
He says "well I know who I'm choosing, because there is a person up there who's dressed as The Stig"
I don't even notice that the camera has panned onto me or that I have the attention of an entire arena.
I just stand up and fold my arms in the slow, precise robotic way that The Stig does.
Before that, from Jeremy's perspective he could probably only see my head. Then he realises I'm a girl and he says "Oh I've definitley got to get a photo".
And thus I am currently in Clarkson's iPhone.
I don't know how the races work. Is it really controlled by the cards and the volume of noise produced by the audience? Or is it controlled by some guy behind the curtain?
Either way, my team won and I ended up on the Lap Times board. Not number one, but quite high up.
So all in all, I'd say it was one of the best days of my life.
And remember, never underestimate the power of a costume.
See photos here as Livejournal doesn't do thumbnails apparently:
http://pyro-the-maniac.deviantart.com/art/Stare-Down-Stair-Down-154428793
http://pyro-the-maniac.deviantart.com/art/Windswept-154431275
http://pyro-the-maniac.deviantart.com/art/Tunnel-154431194
http://pyro-the-maniac.deviantart.com/art/I-Dun-Busted-It-154430707
http://pyro-the-maniac.deviantart.com/art/Lap-Times-154430357
http://pyro-the-maniac.deviantart.com/art/Waiting-for-the-Train-154429386
http://pyro-the-maniac.deviantart.com/art/Train-Challenge-154429619
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| A Discussion on Steampunk |
[28 Jan 2010|07:25pm] |
I am absolutely fascinated by this subculture/genre. But being fairly new it has yet to solidify into something distinct.
Say for example Cyberpunk is easy to describe and recognize as it conforms to a certain set of rules and trademarks. This is because there are so many famous examples of it in fiction. People will immediately think of Blade Runner or the Matrix.
But we are essentially living in that ultra-sleek future now anyway. So where do we go but the past?
To give examples of Steampunk to someone who had absolutely no clue of what it is, one could reference the new Sherlock Holmes(arguabley), Wild, Wild West, Atlantis: The Lost Empire or League of Extraordinary Gentlemen.
These stories take the pulp fiction of old and reinvent it with modern concepts.
But Steampunk is a word too easily tossed around without really knowing what it means.
At its most fundamental level it is the 19th century (specifically the late Victorian to early Edwardian periods) with more advanced technology implementing the resources available at the time.
So no plastics, silicones or whatever other modern materials we have. Instead there is a lot of brass, wood, external pieces, Art Nuevo, exquisite attention to detail and generally form over function
Usually the explanation for this is that the industrial / technological revolutions, the harnessing of electricity or even social movements have occurred significantly earlier than they do in our own timeline.
But interpretations of this idea vary widely from person to person. Or cosplayer to cosplayer, as it would be. You may even disagree with my above description of Steampunk.
But the most common debate I have come across in my research of Steampunk is;
How much modern influence vs how much historical accuracy?
To make something Steampunk, most costumers or artists will add:
Brass
Cogs, gears, external working pieces
Pressure gauges
Steam or primitive electrical powered technology
Goggles
Pocket watches
Striped clothing
Now one could take a completely accurate costume from the 19th century and a jetpack, a ray gun and some jewellery made of mechanical pieces.
Or you could have a fairly modern ensemble with just the slightest influences of the 19th century. Corset, top hat, spats, ect.
You could go either way, but you can’t please everyone when it comes to this issue.
There is also the controversy over “steampunking” existing characters.
Like the Steampunk Star Wars characters that have been circulating the Internet. Personally I love them, I think this sort of thing helps the Steampunk genre get more fans as well as aiding the development of this style.
To add the the confusion there are other similar subgenres such as Dieselpunk and Atompunk.
What are these?
Well like Steampunk, these genres take their name from the most popular energy source of the time.
Dieselpunk takes place around WWII, so think early superheroes, like the Rocketeer.
Atompunk, takes place in the 1950’s, think Bioshock.
And then there is all the other examples of retro-futurism, like Brazil or Treasure Planet that don’t fall under any other genre.
In conclusion I would like to see Steampunk become a more distinct and more popular subgenre. I want to see more examples of it in movies and maybe even see it enter the fashion industry. There are already more examples of it in comics, with stories such as Transformers: Heart of Steel and High Noon.
I would also like to hear your comments and speculations on Steampunk.
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| I AM The Stig |
[28 Jan 2010|02:41pm] |
My Stig costume is done. I'll be taking plenty of photos of it in Sydney when I see Top Gear:Live in about two weeks.
I'll defintley have to take some photos on the train, just like when the Stig was on the train for one of the challenges.
And now for something completely different. I can't find the Evil Dead boxset anywhere! Even on ebay.
I have seen the blue ray for Army of Darkness in Empire Toys, but that's it.
I did manage to find Linda's necklace though. So that will be a nice touch to my Ashley Williams costume.
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| The Internet is for Learning |
[15 Jan 2010|06:49pm] |
It's an odd habit I have gotten into over the past few years. The Internet is fast *shudders at the memory of a dial-up childhood* and it's even more readily available now that I have a laptop in my room.
And with that comes the instant access to all kinds of information.
It is a little frustrating when I find myself watching a movie and slowly making a mental list of all the things I want to look up. Be it a word, a place or actor.
But on the brightside I am educating myself at the same time.
So not much has changed since I was a kid. I reckon most of the things I know come not from school but from my own curiosity. Going and reading books and watching documentaries on the subjects that interested me.
Which at the time was history, mythology, space and dinosaurs.
Again, not much has changed.
Am I the only one who is compulsivley browsing Google and Wikipedia for bits of trivia?
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| Make Your Own Disaster Movie |
[14 Jan 2010|03:38pm] |
I watched 2012 last night because I had nothing better to do and I've also recently seen Knowing. They weren't bad films, they were entertaining but not memorable.
I could pretty much have had a checklist of cliches and ticked every box for both of them.
So here is that said checklist. I guess if you're a director and need a little extra cash, turn out one of these films. It doesn't take any thought.
1.The main character is a man who has either lost his wife to some tragic accident/illness or has recently been divorced.
2.If only seperated from wife, she is going to become a major character in this film and probably get back together with main character.
3.Add children or animals, something innocent that the main character must protect.
4.A very big and very rare natural disaster is going to occur. We need someone to explain all this using big pseudo-scientific phrases that make it sound logical but in actual fact makes no sense at all.
This character can be eccentric, nerdy, comic relief or highly intelligent.
5.The president of the United States must make a powerful speech at some point. He will stand slowly, emotional music will play, the whole room will turn to him, ect.
Of course we never see how this event effects the rest of the world and their leaders.
6.A dramatic action/destruction sequence will occur somewhere around the second or third act that will last roughly five to ten minutes. Or if you are Michael Bay it's just full on destruction through out the entire film.
Usually this sequence will involve famous landmarks being destroyed.
7.The main character, despite only being an average joe, some how manages to survive the whole thing. Secondary characters, not so much.
8.There's always someone in the group that knows how to fly a plane/helicopter or operate some other very specific mode of transportation/device.
9. Despite the destruction, electricity, radio, phones and internet all continue to work or cease functioning at a conveniant point.
10. Ethnic guy dies first
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| Busy Week |
[06 Jan 2010|09:53pm] |
I turned 18 on the 2nd of January.
For some reason I am not happy about this fact. It's been plaguing my mind for the past few weeks.
I am determined to be something, to leave my mark on history. Be like Ozymandias from Watchmen...But with less genocide.
The future is uncertain, and now that I am officially an adult I feel this need to do something significant. Now!
Beyond that, as usual this happiest time of the year for me. I have Xmas, then a week later my birthday.
I did have a good time when everyone came over to my place. Although mum kept taking photos, as she is wont to do.
I haven't looked at them, but I'm thinking that most of them are photos of me making disgusted faces as people make me try various wines and other drinks.
I don't even drink soft drink, I think I'll stick to water, thanks!
That was my first time drinking anything because my parents made me a deal. If my brothers and I don't drink until we are 18 then we get $1000.
Guess who's going shopping?
I also got the Beatles box set and the Ennio Morricone collection. Call me old school but I prefer having physical copies of things rather than files. Saves on downloads too.
I also got a red gum bonsai tree that I have decided to name Opherium. Bonsai trees are rather demanding, but it does look beautiful.
So I got everything I wanted, mostly because my mum looked at my wishlist and gave it to the rest of the family. Screw suprises, just get the right thing.
I only have about ten things on that list now. Mostly DVDs, CDs, action figures and comics.
The next day I was supposed to have my party with my friends at Dark Zone. One of those laser tag places.
I thought it would be ironic to celebrate the year of entering adulthood with doing something childish.
Of course it's not really a party when only two of ten of your friends even remember to show up.
I have alot of ex-friends now.
Even with only those two friends and my two brothers and the incredible heat that is typical around my birthday I did have fun playing out my sci-fi fantasies.
They even played Rob Dougan while I was there.
Then one of my friends stayed the night, we watched Star Trek TOS and The Mighty Boosh.
And the next day we went and saw Sherlocke Holmes. Which being in love with all things of the 19th century I enjoyed it.
I'm not the biggest Guy Ritchie fan, nor do I particularly enjoy remakes. But this one was derivative enough to be something of it's own with slight nods to the original series.
Certainly better and less predicatable than Avatar.
Plus Robery Downey Jr and Jude Law, amirite?
So it was only after that day that I rested. Finally got new guitar strings after about six months, been practicing a bit of Kasabian on it now. Even bruised one of my fingers, how hardcore is that?
So to summarise. Maybe I should learn to turn my analytical mind off and just enjoy the ride that is life.
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| The Twisted Visions Collection: Issue 22 |
[06 Jan 2010|09:04pm] |
I had a dream that I was in the future where people were put into suspended animation during travel.
This was my family's first time using this tehcnology and I was a little nervous about it.
Next thing I know I wake up and these people tell me I have been asleep for not one month as planned (where the Hell were we travelling to? Mars?). But three months.
Apparently they lost my shuttle.
I get really pissed off, apparently because of these guys I have been made to miss something very important.
So I jump out of this little pod thing and proceed to beat the crap out of one of the people responsible. I was all like "how do you lose a person like they're freaking mail? Do you know how much you've ruined my life?!"
So yeah, moral of the story: Suspended animation is bad, m'kay?
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| Cthulhumas 2009 |
[26 Dec 2009|08:56pm] |
Felt terrible for girl reasons, didn't even want to go to lunch at my aunt's place but I was dragged there.
Oh well, I got some good presents out of it. My mum knows me so well.
I got a PSP Go and the Mighty Boosh boxset, brilliant.
I gave my parents a sculpture of a stag that I made and my brother painted.
My nana gave me $50 and a Tchaikovsky album, my favourite composer.
In other news I have been watching nothing but Gargoyles lately. I only vaguely remember it as a kid, for some reason the character Brooklyn is most vivid in my memory and my brother's. Strange.
It's alot like Batman the Animated Series, each episode as consistantly good as the last and is just as much fun to watch now as it was when I was a kid. Definitley some fan art coming for that.
While I watch it I spend alot of time thinking about what the Gargoyles would look like in reality. What they evolved from, how their wings work, how they live, ect.
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